Chapman called himself Peter Cartwright – and claimed he was 17, single, a window maker and part-time DJ from Liverpool and His lies conned Ashleigh Hall into meeting him near Sedgefield in the UK.

Last night, Peter Chapman started his 35 years in prison.

People committing hideous crimes like the ones that Chapman did, are affecting all of us on a lot of different levels – But most of all; They create fear within each one of us.

Fear is never a good feeling and it makes us sometimes see things in a distorted way. It makes us think that every killer is hanging out on the web and all of them are into kinky sex. This is were the deductive thinking with most people goes wrong: Man, into kinky sex = killer, predator and rapist.

Fear makes us apply generalisations to a larger degree than we usually would do. This is something that will affect us all and especially people within the kink communities with honest intentions when they join different social networks.

My advise to people asking me about meeting a kinky partner through a social networking site is to have some simple safety measures in place before meeting up with that person.

• If it is too good to be true, then it usually is – If you bump into a person, try to see through your own “romantic filters” by being sober about everything. Remember that when we are chatting with people online in text, we mostly read things with our own voice and interpret from the specific mood we are in at that moment. If the person you are chatting with in text seems so perfect after two chat sessions, then I would say that you romantic filters are cluttering things up. Differentiate between the romanticised image you have of BDSM or another kink and the reality of it.
• Tell your friends about the new person that you are chatting with as soon as possible – Friends are good to have, especially if they don’t agree with you because they can sometimes make you see things in a different light. Let your friends in on your intentions and feelings.
• Social networks are special environments to meet a partner in – Social networks are a wonderful things and they have made the kink community bloom due to the fact that it is so easy to find a person that is into the same thing as you are. I personally love this fact and I am all for it. This also comes at a price; Thruth and honesty are sometimes rare commodities when it comes to social networks and the possibility to be anonymous or deceitful about your true identity emphasize this fact. Don’t trust pictures and personal profiles on the web, we all want to look good when we are being looked at by others and how people present themselves in a social network is comparable to how you present yourself during a job interview – You want to make yourself look as good as possible. Added to this problem is another phenomena – Some people out there role play in forums and social networks through identities that they have made up and to them the social networks are just big gaming areas where they can  emo play or create social destruction.
• Always check up on the other persons credibility and the validity of the information given – Some people might find it a bit rude to check up on the background of the other person. I don’t agree with this opinion at all, you are just doing your homework and it is a homework that has to be done for the sake of your own safety. It doesn’t matter if your are a Dominant or a submissive, you are literally putting your life in the hands of another person when you eventually decide to meet up with. Ask where that person went to school, name of friends and other tidbits that can be of importance. When you have some information then you can actually check up if what the person is saying is true or not.
• Use references – Ask for references, friends that can confirm what the other is saying is actually true. If the other person don’t want to give you any information regarding this then there might be something fishy going on. The usage of references is quite well accepted within the BDSM community and this is where the local BDSM community and  the online community should work together. Check with the local BDSM community about their opinion about the person you are chatting with. A person that is both active in the local community as well as in the online community is, to my opinion, less prone to be a “player” – And to be honest; There are always players within every BDSM oriented social network – People that claim that they are into BDSM but what they are actually looking for is an easy fuck.

If the person you are chatting with is honest, then they will help you out to follow the pointers above. If the person isn’t honest about themselves then you will probably find inconsistencies in the stories that you are being fed with – And if that is the case then pull out.

If and when you decide to meet up with the person then there is a set of safety measures that always has to be in place.

• When you meet with the other person for the first time, do it in a public setting – Meet up with the person during a munch or a BDSM gathering. By doing so you always have the possibility to call out for help if anything should happen. If the other person are doing last minute changes and want you to meet up with him/her in a more secluded setting then pull out. Never get into the other persons car or house because then you are  making yourself quite vulnerable.
• Always tell your friends where you are going and who you are going with – Tell your friends, in detail, about your plans and time schedule in order to make it easier for them to sound the alarm in case you should divert from the original details that you have given.
• The other person you are meeting should also be concerned about your safety – If the person you are going to meet up with care about you then he/she should also be concerned about your safety. I always find it more assuring if the other person is explicitly telling me that I am given information so I can do a check up. It is also a good sign if the other person is giving your pointers on how to keep yourself safe when you are meeting up with them for the first time.
• Always do safety calls - This is a technique that is very efficient and it basically means that you ask the same friend that know about your schedule and who you are going to meet up with to receive your safety calls. You are then supposed to call your friend at a certain time and if you don’t call within a certain time then that friend should start to take measures. Do a lot of safety calls during your initial date, one call isn’t enough. Don’t leave any room for errors, your life might be dependant on this one.
• Use code - If you should end up in trouble and the person putting you in trouble is forcing you to do the safety call and act as normal, then do so. But have an established codeword that will tell your friend that you are in danger and that you are making the safety call under threat.
• Some cellphones can be used as tracking devices – Technological advances are wonderful when it comes to personal safety. Before you are going to meet up with a person you have met through a social network then subscribe to a tracking service. Give the access to the tracking service to your friend that knows about your activities and is the one that receives your safety calls. Your friend can then track your positions and judge if they are consistent with your schedule.
• Always inform the person you are meeting that you have safety procedures in place – This one works as a deterrent and the other person will also know that you are taking care of yourself. A responsible and honest date will confirm that and agree with your safety measures.
• Never play on the first date – Use the first time to get to know the other person and to just talk. This might not be easy if you are horny for some play, but as they say; Patience is a virtue.
• Never get locked up the first time you play – Never agree to being locked up on the first time you play because you don’t know how the other person operates during play and being looked up leaves you exposed. This should be applied even if you decide to play with the person at a BDSM club as loud music and dim lights can mask a situation that needs attention from others. If you are locked up, then you cannot escape, it is as simple as that.

It’s time to get street smart about social networks.

I’ve used social networks when meeting up with the submissives I have had relationships with and I have always used these guidelines when meeting submissives abroad for my own protection – Even Dominants can end up at the wrong end of the stick. I have always been on my guard for a fair amount of time, my physical and emotional safety is dependant on it.

Remember that trust is never given, it is always earned. It is something that the other person has to earn through an expected behaviour and if the expected behaviour isn’t there – Get out…

The sexy and sophisticated harness features a flattering low-rise design that fits around the hips, not the waist, with genuine garment leather straps that are strong yet soft against bare skin.

Even more experienced strap-on users may not be aware that the difference between harnesses that adjust with buckles and those that adjust with D-rings is more than just aesthetic.

“There’s a functional distinction between buckles and D-rings when it comes to strap-on harnesses,” says Stockroom Brand Manager and Product Educator Ann-Marie Holman. “The more securely the harness can stay in place without twisting or pulling away from the body, the more confident the wearer feels, and the more directly the motion of her body translates to the motion of the dildo – which feels more exciting and more natural to the partner on the receiving end.”Buckles, Holman explains, also hold straps firmly so that they stay exactly as placed. But D-rings – through which the straps slide to make adjustments – allow the wearer to adjust the fit far more quickly than buckles can. “Since the most secure fit and placement of the harness depends on the position of the wearer’s body, the D-rings let a woman easily readjust and rearrange her harness as she and her partner switch positions, without interrupting the action,” says Holman.

Another advantage of the D-ring model for retailers is that one size more truly fits all – the size range on this new harness, 33.5 – 50 inches (85 – 127 cm), spans a slightly larger range of hip sizes than the Regular and Full Curves sizes of the current Kinklab harness with buckles taken together.

Ms. Holman added, “The leather straps of the new model are doubled and stitched for strength, so you can be as energetic as you like. Another advantage is that the rear straps leave cheeks bare so you can be fully available to your partner.”

The three O-rings of the harness are made of synthetic nitrile rubber that is safe for most people with allergies to natural latex.  The O-ring sizes (1.5” (3.8 cm), 1.75” (4.4 cm), 2” (5 cm) are designed to fit strap-on compatible dildos from most manufacturers. The O-rings snap out with small tabs, making it easy to switch out different-size attachments.

To me it is quite clear why this blog should care – We are sex positive and we want to celebrate all women that have recognised their freedom of choice.

The International Women’s Day was established in 1910 and first celebrated in 1911 by over 1 million people in different parts of Europe. Looking back at it, one hundred years ago women didn’t have a lot of choices – Women weren’t even allowed to vote in various countries. Those were different times and different injustices.

But the injustices still exists in different forms and one is women’s limited freedom to embrace their sexuality. This becomes very clear when some people claim that women being submissives are actually victims of a patriarchal system. According to these people submissives are under such an influence by the patriarchal system that they have no other choice than to become submissives and one of the loudest Sadophobes is Alice Schwarzer.

What these people don’t seem to understand that they are working in opposite direction. By stigmatising submissive women within BDSM they are actually taking away the freedom of choice for women to embrace and express their sexuality. This is mostly based on a lack of knowledge regarding consent and the fact that you always have a choice within BDSM. The biggest flaw in their criticism is the fact that there are Dominant women as well in the BDSM community, which should tell them that women have a choice within BDSM and sometimes it is a choice that they wouldn’t be able to have outside of community.

Submissives are highly regarded and respected within the BDSM community because they have made their choice based on their own free will and to do so you need to be courageous and highly aware of your wants and needs.

So I would like to call out to everyone within the BDSM community to use the International Women’s Day as a great opportunity to celebrate the women that have made the choice to live out their submissive or Dominant sides. Because these women have chosen to recognise, embrace and express their sexuality and in the end; Their choice.

We are celebrating your freedom of choice and my respect goes out to all of you…

They have a  bundle of erotic film makers that do porn movies that tickles your brain in order to get to your genitals. The movies are on more in the art domain and I found them very pleasant. I would like to recommend a movie that they have which is called Handcuffs. Unfortunately I can’t embed it into this post, so you have to click the link to watch it.

Some of their movies have won awards at Barcelona Erotic Film Festival, which is in my opinion a very prestigious award.

Head over to their website and give them a try…

Somewhere in Asia, they seem to have incorporated the symbolism of having a submissive as a piece of furniture, judging by the pictures I’ve found

Source: Alternative Mindset

To cut a long story short, he did something in a group that was a little bit out of line according the etiquette within that environment. He apologized over and over again, which I thought wasn’t necessary as mistakes happen. He then pointed out that he didn’t feel good about it.

Why didn’t he feel good about it, is it because we have reached a point where our society isn’t forgiving at all? As usual, the answer to that question might be a very complex one.

It might depend on where you come from, of course, as cultural factors might be significant to how we deal with mistakes. Let me break down this a little bit.

1. Why do mistakes happen?

The main reason to why mistakes happen is that we feel so confident in a context, that we start to relax and interpret things a little bit sloppy. Another reason is that we are convinced that we have all the fact at hand or all the knowledge that we need and we operate based on that belief. What we often don’t know is actually what we don’t know, in other words; We don’t have a clue about specific gaps in our knowledge and we are convinced that we don’t have any gaps.

2. What happens when the mistake itself is a fact?

There are a lot of emotions going down when a mistake occurs. The one that carried out the mistake might feel ashamed and wants to get out of that feeling because it is uncomfortable. One strategy is to not recognize the mistake and trying to find other valid or invalid explanations – Justifying the mistake. If you believe that a person reacting like this is an evil one, then you have to think again – Guilt is often a heavy burden on your well being so the attempts to not recognize the mistake is rather a representation of our survival instincts than a person trying to exercise pure evil in terms of sociopathic behaviour.

The person that is on the other side of a mistake might also feel embarassed and will also employ certain strategies in order to have their feelings reckognised. One is to enforce guilt and remorse from the person that did the mistake. This strategy will of course not work, the effect of it will be that both parties will dig trenches and keep pounding each other with guilt trips and sooner or later they are discussing irrelevant matters compared to the initial mistake that sparked everything off into an explosion.

3. How do you solve mistakes?

Turning back the time isn’t possible, so that won’t be a sustainable solution to a mistake that has caused a lot of grief or heated emotions. Take a good look at what I wrote why mistakes happen; Due to lack of knowledge. Try to help each other out to fill these knowledge gaps – Be creative. Inform the other person about YOUR feelings and reactions, then let the other person explain what THEY feel. The important thing when doing this is to do it with an intent to create an understanding rather than a guilt trip. You can never request the reckognition of your feelings if the other person doesn’t understand you. It is also very important to not use sentences like “You made me feel this way because……..” as it will only push the other one into a corner. You are, from their perspective, trying to put guilt on their shoulder which is the very thing they are trying to deal with from the start. Use neutral descriptions instead, even if you are angry or upset by the thing that happened. An exaample would be to start an explanatory sentence with “It made me feel like…..”

4. The most important thing – Mistakes are actually learning experiences!

What most people seem to dwell upon when it comes to mistake is the guilt, shame and hurt. But what if we go beyond those feelings?

Allow me to use an analogy; I’m a trained pilot and during my pilot training we actually learned to do mistakes and deal with them. Good airmanship actually means that you don’t put prestige in your own skills and your mistakes. The consensus within the pilot community is that mistakes will happen to everyone - It’s just a question about when and where. When mistakes eventually happens to a pilot it’s really important to see the mistakes as they are – A series of circumstances that played against your lack of knowledge. All pilots learn that it is really important to step out of yourself and take a good look at what really happened – For your own safety and well being. If you lack the skill to discuss your own mistakes as a pilot then you’re a dangerous pilot and you will not allow anyone else to learn from your mistakes.

Mistakes are learning experiences – They will show you, with brute honesty, where you don’t have a clue. In other words; Mistakes are really good for learning opportunities because they will tell you where you have to get more knowledge about certain things. Mistakes are very important pieces of knowledge, even though it is a very painful way to gain understanding about something that usually refers to ourselves.

If we would think about mistakes this way instead then more people would be more confident – Not from doing the actual mistake, but they would gain confidence if they look at the mistake and then see what they actually have learnt from it – Especially what they have learnt about themselves.

5. How does all this relate to BDSM?

Mistakes will happen when you do BDSM, physical and emotional ones. I do them as a Dominant and I am fairly sure that Submissives do them them too. As BDSM also is a journey into yourself, then it is important to deal with mistakes in a good way. Mistakes will happen and that’s ok, as long as we learn something from them and actually admit to that they do happen – It’s just a question of when and where.

6. Do you always follow your own thoughts regarding mistakes?`

Not always, I do mistakes as well – But when I do it has always given me something valuable; New knowledge.

According to Times Online Japan Airlines has faced mass layoffs, customer fury and national shame since the bankruptcy but it has also created a market opportunity for others. We might be witnessing a potentially thriving black market for the uniforms worn by its air stewardesses.

For decades, the crisp, no-nonsense outfits have appealed to male Japanese tastes. New Japan Airlines (JAL) uniforms have long been in demand in the local sex industry for customers keen on role-playing fantasies, while rare specimens that have actually been worn are hugely sought after by fetishists and are worth their weight in gold.

The uniform of a Japan Airlines stewardess was once sold for $16,000, according to Tokyo specialist costumer Yu Teramoto. And uniforms that have actually been worn are worth more.

JAL has long been aware of the uniform’s mysterious power and has been at great pains to ensure that none of the real ones ever get on to the black market. Efforts have included putting a serial number into each item of clothing, and keeping meticulous records of the exact whereabouts of garments all around the world.

The risk of a new flood of uniforms on to the black market has raised the stakes for the airlines. All Nippon Airways (ANA) — which has the same problem — has begun sewing computer chips into its stewardess uniforms so that errant skirts, jackets and hats can be tracked from space. JAL is understood to be installing a similar system.

A spokesperson for JAL described a series of measures that meant that it was “virtually impossible for an individual to hold on to their uniform after they have left their job”. He admitted that a uniform of the sort worn by staff in the business-class lounge had been stolen a few years ago and had appeared on an internet auction site. JAL paid £1,500 for the uniform to keep it off the market.

Mr Teramoto told The Times, however, that there had always been a few that escaped the JAL dragnet and which had found their way into specialist shops. In a notorious incident five years ago, twelve ANA uniforms were stolen during an advertising shoot. Eight were returned after a nationwide amnesty but four are still at large. Mr Teramoto claims to know of one uniform from that famous haul that sold for £11,000.

Source: Times Online

“A mediocre Master tells, a good Master teaches, an excellent Master explains, but a True Master inspires”

— Author Unknown

A submissive is a fine tuned instrument that is exposing her delicate strings. The strings are gently plucked by the Dominant, the composer of the journey that they both have chosen to embark on. The instrument and the composer work together in harmony to create a masterpiece of music that will affect their inner being and slowly move them along an uncharted path.

The composer trusts the instrument to be in tune, as she trust him to compose the kind of music she is ready for.

Joe Gets Dominated was hilarious to look at if you a sense of  humours regarding your BDSM.

The sequel to this is not equally hilarious, but it made me smile a couple of times at least.

Twisted, Tsunami & Ecstacy

It is always interesting to read about how other people approach BDSM and usually I don’t rant about it.

But this time it’s different.

I’ve read the interview a couple of times and the thing that makes me really baffled is how easy it is for some people to label themselves as professionals. Of course, it might be media that wants to see them as professional – But it still makes me wonder.

There is especially one quote that got stuck in my mind:

Tsunami: I would say that we’re professional about it. We’re always trying to expand what we know about various types of torture. Hygiene is definitely important. We try to stay as far away from germs as we can. Occasionally we’ll bring out the gloves. We have hand sanitizer.

If hygiene is the thing that will turn you into a professional, then I would say that most people with common sense, while doing BDSM, are professionals.

Maybe it is wrong choice of words – Maybe common sense was what they were looking for when they used the word professional.

All the Dominants I know find a lot of pride in planning things to a very detailed level. They also find it very satisfying to read up on things so they can push the boundaries with confidence and in a safe way. That doesn’t make them professional – It’s what turns them into damn good Dominants.

Maybe I am worried when some people within BDSM are almost treated like rock stars by media.

Maybe I am worried when the term professional is diminished and washed out when it is used – Especially when the definition of a professional Dominant isn’t very well defined when it comes to expected level of experience and knowledge.

Maybe I am just worried in general and this is the price we have to pay when BDSM is taken for a spin by the main stream culture.

Everyone has an opinion when it comes to porn, but a general one is that porn is, in most cases, made with a male audience in mind. It is a consensus that I have agreed to myself, but I am actually starting to doubt it.

I’ve read a really interesting column on this subject today; Sex columnist: Porn fest just not for men.

The author, Jeanetta Bradley, points out a couple of interesting things. One is that in most porn movies women are gorgeous and  men don’t look that good, with a reference to the old porn dog Ron Jeremy.

But is this a totally fair assumption?

Look at it from another perspective – Internet is filled with all sorts of diverse kinks and the perception of beauty is, as always, in the eye of the beholder. There is a lot of porn out there that differs from the normative concept of beauty. Porn with large women, amateurs, housewives, home made, grannies and trannies.

In other words, Internet has made the porn industry become more diversified and in some cases it has made the porn industry divert from the normative concept of beauty, which is all good in the end.

Jeanetta also mentions Kara’s Porn for Women as place where you can find porn made for women as a target audience. A site where you can find chiseled hunks in different poses.

But isn’t that just turning the tables?

Instead of having gorgeous women we have gorgeous men and voila – Female porn.

There might be a few reasons for this interpretation of what female porn actually is. One is that the porn industry itself might be affected by an ongoing gender discussion which leads to gender differentiated material based on rather  simplistic interpretations regarding gender based markets.

Another reason is that porn represents an ideal as it is based on the fantasies of both men and women. This ideal is usually pushed into an extreme so it can be represented in accordance with the type of media that it’s portrayed within. Movies have a limited running time and the expectations of either gender, when watching a porn movie, are instant gratification and visually oriented material. Books on the other hand are usually oriented towards feeding other parts of your brain, which makes them suitable for a rich description of emotions and internal processing within the portrayed character.

A rich emotional description of internal thoughts and feelings is usually not possible communicate in a porn movie and the audience, independent of being male or female, is usually not expecting this either.

I usually refrain from saying that women are less turned on by porn movies as I am fairly sure that there are women that get off from watching a simple porn movie where the plumber knocks on the door and a gorgeous and busty female in a thin night gown opens the door and grabs him by his cock with the famous line “There you are, I am so horny – Let’s get down to business.”

I also try to avoid saying that women are more turned on by books compared to movies because of the emotional descriptions as I believe that being turned on by something is quite contextual – If you want instant gratification working with your visual cortex, then you watch porn as it is quickly digested. If you want a complex web of emotions and the possibility to build the image in your head and insert yourself into the setting, then you read an erotic story.

In the end it all comes down to one critical question; Is it really feasible to differentiate porn into female and male porn or is it just a fashionable statement based on gender discussions?

There is no simple answer to that question, but I would like to offer an alternative foundation when it comes to categorisation of porn.

Why not talk about reality porn and porn based on fantasies?

Amateur porn, porn with big women, grannies etc is what I would define to be more in the reality domain of porn. It depicts real body shapes and how people actually l0ok and it is not based on the normative ideal. It has of course an element of fantasy built into it, but the main emphasis is geared towards to how people actually look.

Fantasy porn represents the normative ideal descriptions of the characters which have all perfect bodies, the largest pair of tits you’ve ever seen and of course – Well hung and a six pack if you are a male character.

When it comes to BDSM porn it is the same thing, both categories exist. It is still a boiled down brew based on the fantasies of it that people usually have.

On the other hand good, BDSM porn in movie formats is usually geared towards showing the brain fucking that goes on within BDSM – If we are looking at reality porn based on BDSM.

When it comes to reality and BDSM then it is a different matter as I perceive the BDSM community to be a crowd with a warm welcome to people of all kinds, body shapes and looks. But that is a different story and has nothing to do with porn.

One of Britain’s largest top online sex shops, Temptations Direct, has presented some really interesting figures in the shadow of the world wide economic crisis.

During 2009, it witnessed the sales of fetish products growing significantly more than adult products in general. And, recently, sales of fetish goods ahead of Valentines Day 2010 more than doubled on sales in 2009. In particular.

In the 12 months to January 2010, the top five sellers in Temptations Direct’s fetish range were:

Restraints – up 390%
Strap ons – up 370%
Fetish penis rings – up 350%
Clamps – up 340%
Masks and hoods – up 290%

Chastity devices and whips/canes also saw a strong growth in demand, with an annual rise in sales of 270% and 180% respectively.

Stephen Hackett of Temptations Direct comments: “Fetish imagery is now firmly ingrained in mainstream pop culture and high street fashion, and it’s regularly seen in movies and TV adverts. Meanwhile, fetish clubs such as Torture Garden remain extremely popular amongst UK club-goers. With financial woes compelling Brits to spend more time at home, it’s hardly surprising that sexually liberated adults are increasingly choosing to experiment with bondage, flogging, role play and dressing up in kink-wear.”

He adds: “For many of our customers, pain is pleasure and what better way to relieve recession frustrations than by unleashing that naughty side? Whether people are into the more playful product lines, such as costumes and blindfolds, or want to experiment with full-on bondage restraints and electric genital devices, fetish has come out of its niche and is whipping up a wild time in bedrooms and playrooms throughout the UK.”

Maybe we are seeing a change in the economy with the help of the sex industry?

Personally I hope so.

We have gone through another year with the Island of Pain blog – And what a year it has been!

During the past year I felt that we had to change a lot of things as I started to think that either we concentrate on the blog or just drop it. So we changed a lot of things through planning and because we wanted to take things in another direction.

So we started with changing the design and the way we did things. We went from just being personal to being personal and informative on a general level – Our podcasts is a result of that change.

The podcasts are my babies and something that I have a passion for, even if the production time is quite long. As a natural progression we went into radio shows which enables us to have a totally different experience when it comes to the interaction with our readers. Through the shows we have a true dialogue with people and can act instantly on it.

We have also taken a clear stance when it comes to where we stand in regards to certain issues within BDSM activism – Something that we clearly try to expose in a lot of posts we do.

If we have an opinion on things then you will hear about it.

It is my opinion that all these changes have made this blog into something we have a passion for and love to work with – And that is something that our readers seem to have picked up on as well. We write about the things we do because we want to, but we also write about them because we want to educate, clarify, create opinions, provoke, communicate, spread the word or just help. I try to write things that reflects my personality and so has everyone else writing on this blog also done.

The fact that our readers have picked up on all this is something that is clearly reflected in our numbers.

We had 108 posts, 248 comments and 8500 unique visitors during our first year – Which were, to us, quite good. I was convinced that we could do better and that is why we started to do a lot of changes late august in 2009.

The numbers during the second year blew our mind: 250 new comments, 236 new posts,  and a whopping 60 000 additional unique visitors! In a addition to that we have about 6000 downloads of our podcasts and radio shows that we started doing in late october of 2009.

I would like say a big thank you to everyone that have contributed through writing a lot of interesting posts during our first and second year; Little Snowpaw, Cloud Bracken, Catastrophe Scaggs, Allsmiles Sideshow etc. And everyone that have left comments with insights; Delicia Dreschler, Dane Gundersen, Diana Allendale and Lordsir Ninetails and everyone else that have contributed to keep the discussions going.

Thank you everyone – You are all the reason to why we exist as you take a keen interest in what we are doing right now and what we are trying to do in the future.

A vaction is for your soul what lubricant is for anal sex; Sometimes necessary.

It’s only pain dear. And it’s only yours

— Unknown sadist

The subject for this show will be: Online D/s: Real or Just a Game?

There is sometimes a divider within the BDSM community when people claim that they are doing online D/s. One part of the community doesn’t look at it as a real activity – It’s just on a computer screen, therefor it isn’t real BDSM. While others claim that it is a subset of the BDSM scene. We want to discuss this – What is your experience and opinion?

We will look at the positive sides of Online D/s as well as the downsides.

You can use Skype to call us during the show (add us to your friendslist) – Our skype name is bdsmlifestyle. We will also accept questions/opinions through Twitter which we will try to keep an eye on during the show. All participation will be anonymously.

You access the Island of Pain Radio show by tuning in or clicking on the Web Radio choices that we have on the right side of the blog or if you feel technically savvy then you type in 89.160.63.132 and port 8000 in your preferred web radio software. Some players want the format to be like this: 89.160.63.132:8000

There is a lot of festivals going down in July – August and it’s a great opportunity to meet fellow kinksters and get your exhibitionist urges satisfied. Take a look at the article Annual Pride Events in Scandinavia to find out more about the different pride festivals. If you want to get inspired then take a look at the video clip. Sun, kinky people and nice music – What more could one ask for?