I asked Cloud to write a little piece about her experience in our prison; In For Life. She spent a whopping 182 online hours in there and this is her experience of it all. Feel free to ask her question in the comments to this post. I’m passing the keyboard over to Cloud Bracken:
What was it like to spend that many hours in prison?
It was less boring then i expected but then i tend to find things to do.
i wrote in a journal, which i shared with my Master. i also sometimes had writing assignments from my Master, for example on BDSM Punishment and Discipline, on BDSM training, on Rules for subs. i had some assignments on practicing Swedish pronunciation; that was lol sooooo hard and a real test of obedience to perform, but a source of great mutual amusement ultimately.
I tested a lot of the solo “toys” once i was not confined just to my cell, especially the exercise yard, however I didn’t spend much time in the wreck room (yes it’s a wreck of a rec room 
).
If i walked the fence line it was PURELY for exercise as i would NEVER consider escape options… ((Any escape from IFL should not involve cheating; i consider TPs, movement by Sit, or even superhuman if SL functional leaps over fences to be cheating…))
i read some BDSM websites and books; sometimes my Master enjoys me reading those aloud.
i also did a little mild editing of my AO, and my belt collar (there is no rezz to ground allowed to prisoners).
i updated my profile for RP details. i wrote some notes towards IFL RP tips.
i RP’d with the various prison personnel (judges, wardens, other guards) and prisoners.
i had visitors, that was VERY enjoyable; one arrived via [CENSORED! No details of rescue/escape account permitted!]
i did have some IM chats (with my Master’s approval lol, i know some thought i was forbidden that but i was allowed this by my Master; i was the only prisoner for quite awhile.) i tried to avoid this, but it was very difficult, especially at first. . I chose to leave my most chatty groups before my RP seriously began. That was partly a practical choice; it’s much easier to RP without distractions, and it also gives a cleaner chat log.
i edited my arrest and trial transcripts, adding in the excellent pictures LD Dreadlow took. (Thank you, LD, very much! LD might be available for shooting other RP events if one asks her nicely.)
i was very kindly taken by prison authorities on a VERY few furloughs, to Diana’s BDSM reading on the Island of Pain, and to her Erotica writing workshop on the City of Pain.
It is entirely a malicious rumor that i created the Free Cloud Bracken signs. ((::grin::))
i reread the judicial manual and figured out several cool RP possibilities for cloud or others.
i seriously contemplated the state of my developing relationship with my Master, and myself as a submissive.
But – i was there 182 online hours so i had the luxury of time to do all that. And i still had time to get a little bored; boredom willingly accepted in a BDSM context is not such a bad thing. The emotional ride can be thought provoking or enjoyable just on its own.
You are not describing your time with your Master…
well much of that is private for U/us, or for Him to speak about. But i can summarize some ::grin:: of our time together. We spent much time talking, about our particular BDSM and RL interests; about BDSM concepts and practical realities and how that is to integrated or not into O/our relationship. W/we talked about O/our experience together to date, and our pasts, and O/our desires for the future. And my parole statement is also a good overall statement on how W/we spent some time. [Statement is quoted below].
I am also not attempting to describe what my Master’s prison experience was, either the parts that i witnessed, or the ones i did not (when He was out of the prison, or when He was in the prison when i was offline.
Was the experience fun? Or was it work?
For me it was both, by choice. In For Life is a yummy BDSM playground setting, distraction free, well equipped. But for my Master and me, it was also almost a BDSM honeymoon retreat, and an opportunity for some serious “work”/play. i guess maybe all play, but serious play at times, play with intent.
What was unpleasant about the experience?
::grin:: a few of my friends don’t RP and/or don’t “get” BDSM. They worried about me, and sometimes that kind concern was expressed in ways revealing their discomfort with… my being a pervert? lol that term for me is usually NOT an insult – i call some of my best friends “perv” in a teasing manner. But when it really comes with that arrogant judgmental superiority, the attitude is disappointing or annoying.
On the other hand i also got a bit of an attitude from a very few about RP, role-playing; there ARE a few otherwise creative neat people who don’t get THAT either. i had a really wonderful discussion of that with a RL friend; i really shouldn’t mention that in context of what was unpleasant, because the discussion was enjoyable for both of us, discovering some differences in how our minds work… But there were others who were a little smug/superior in their own choice or inability to RP. Poor souls ::grin::
Your parole/release hearing statement; was that IC In character or OOC Out of Character?
Both. It’s a fair summary of my BDSM RP experience. And it was In Character and leaves me a few threads for possible future RP.
statement: “Supreme Judge, Helmer’s submissive realizes now what how guilty she was of the charges for which she was rightly convicted and rightly imprisoned. This submissive had NOT informed her Master of things He needed to know of His sub. More than just a few omissions, this was in fact a pattern in her behavior. This was not the only damning flaw in this submissive; as the Supreme Judge correctly stated at trial, she was proud. Even while conforming to the etiquette of O/our society, this submissive remained utterly independent in her arrogant thoughts, not respecting her Master’s ownership of her which this willfulness essentially violated.
The time here in In For Life has allowed my Master to train me to better and necessary habits, of offering information on what this submissive is doing and thinking so that He may truly have my Submission. This… dare i call it a sanctuary? has allowed my Master to create and refine Rules appropriate for me. It has provided a place for my re-education, and uninterrupted reflection and processing of the training my Master chooses for me. In this place free of distractions, even those of dressing to delight my Master’s eye, focussed attention to Trust and Obedience has been possible. My Master has opened doors for U/us here, literally and figuratively, and i am happy for Him to Guide me. i trust Him.
This prisoner is most grateful to her Master and to You, Supreme Judge for this time, and is content to be where her Master chooses. She hopes someday to return to O/our society and serve this cause and the Judicial System however seems appropriate to her Master and to the legitimate authorities of Society. But most of all, she desires to please her Master, to be trained by Him, to be His.”
What was it like getting out? Did it FEEL like getting out of confinement?
For me, it did feel like i was getting out of a restricted environment. i was glad to chat without restrictions with people who came to the release event and in the Square. My Master and i went to a lot of visually and musically stimulating places very soon after my release. We had fun picking my clothes ::grin:: as both of us were tired of The Orange Jump suit. Though my Master and i are lol NOT sick of each others company, i went to a discussion group on my own when he was offline and thoroughly enjoyed it. i did a little shopping, as did my Master i think .Went dancing. Wasn’t online as much lol.
i have yet to rejoin most of the chatty groups i left for the sake of this RP…; i have joined one for a support question but left iot again… because i realized how much time was eaten up by the distractions of the interruptions, most of which were content-less spam.
I do think really immersing in the RP and its environment is a good thing; otherwise i’d have cheated myself of the opportunity i sought. Some of what went on in the prison, emotionally, was not what i expected. But it was maybe more valuable because it was not.
What were the RP or interactions with people other than your Guard/Dom like?
Generally extremely enjoyable. i was a private prisoner so limits were pretty clearly underlying any RPs which approached “Play”. Other RP included interactions with prison officials (tormenting by wardens and judges), other prisoners and Guards, one of whom applied a restriction of movement outside my cell, which my Master had given me. Doms disciplining someone else’s submissive is a little bit of a no-no in my book; but in the prison context it WAS logical, and i RPd it in character. That’s probably my advice on that, but also that Dom/me-subs discuss the RP limits; find an RP way to keep your relationship rules In Character…
What if one CANNOT RP a scene in character, or really needs to stop it? What are safewords in this context?
Ok consent is fundamental to both BDSM and Role Play. You always have the option of using a statement like “OOC: i cannot do this scene; body modification such as scarring is a Hard Limit for me.” or “OOC: i need to stop, this is pushing a button i did not realize i had; really shaken up here…” or such. Do not just bolt; there’s a certain responsibility involved in any BDSM play, of caring for mutual well being; help each other.
Now if you sadly discover that one of you isn asshole who does NOT respect limits (assholes exist), you can resort to more severe “safewords” – subs can remove the prison collar; can ask the Wardens or Judges for help; can even exit SL. But those should be last resort because it’s really more healthy if you can find a way through with somebody… However if you need to use a “safeword”, DO and don’t feel bad about it. But you might be asked to clarify to others what happened, in general terms.
Are you the subversive the Supreme Judge accused you to be?
Nooooo! i’m innocent, i mean rehabilitated, completely.. Abso-fracking-lutely. ((We’ll see… ))
Related posts:
Cloud or Stoltz, is there a schedule for prisoners or any required activities?
For prisoners there are no required activities (at least at this time) aside from what the assigned Guard (Dom/me) may set. And that’s not a bad idea at all, especially if there is a SL schedule challenge in their online time together. i suppose Guards could make agreements with other guards or staff too if that seemed fun. Oh – one required activity: the trial; no one gets in without one.
Cloud is totally correct, the stay in prison is a pair effort, your dominant will be you guard and is the one responsible for all training activities.
We wanted to create a sort of retreat where the Dom/Sub can push the limits together. The sentence itself is our attempt to create a bridge between RL BDSM and SL BDSM, the purpose of the sentence is to create a real emotional experience. Look at it like a form of meditation.
The prison experience are not for the casual “gamer-BDSM” person, and was never intended to be that. This is an experience created towards the submissives that want to evolve their stamina and determination on a mental level. That is the challange, to handle the boredom. And when you are bored, all of a sudden your time with your dominant seems like a focused and wonderful time in relation to the rest of it